Life Begins Again

Almost one year later and I’m back!

I’m writing this in that fuzzy Saturday morning cocoon; completely resembling Homer Simpson being a toasty cinnamon bun, and not feeling an ounce guilt for it. Until I get overheated or need a wee that is, and then the moment’s broken..

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So university happened. I finally graduated in June 2016 and spent a gorgeous few days in the Highlands afterwards. I consumed my body weight in whisky-cream porridge and homemade cakes, and it was a lovely last hurrah to my Scottish life.

I also found a job at the end of May in customer service, something I’m still working in, but isn’t quiiite the Job For Life we imagine in our younger years. It did however, introduce me to some really great people. My kinda people, and also not my kinda people, but it’s all a learning curve and I’ve made some brilliant memories.

I made a best friend. You know in your twenties, when you’ve done the school thing, the college, the university, and you’re blindly thinking you’ve met everyone under the sun and that this is it now? But something, or someone happens. You realise you’re in fact wrong; you Do carry on living, you Are continuously meeting new people, and you’ll Never stop growing as a person. Meeting someone I now refer to as my soul-sister and part-time wife has been the biggest blessing. We discuss the current political (crises?!), the newest memes, the latest boys and our religious views all in the same lunch hour.

She’s a good egg and has helped open my eyes to the fact that life doesn’t stop after university, and actually I think it’s once that hedonistic blur is over and done with, you can then truly begin to establish who you are and what you want from life. I don’t think that¬†journey of self-discovery ever really ends though..

So I’m back and I’m bad as they say (bad at er, keeping regular on the ole blog), but better late than never.

I’m excited to get this up and running again, so watch this space…..

TTFN, P x

 

 

Change of Seasons

I think this could possibly be my first post where it is written without planning and published all on the same day – possibly within 1 hour!

Summer draws to a close in a week’s time and I’m heading back up to Glasgow early tomorrow morning (Friday 18th September). Several times now across the realms of the internet I have read the lamentations of people’s dread for Autumn; the transition not so much a transition, but more a gust of icy wind tumbling straight towards them in the leaf littered air, the feeling much more like a tonne of bricks than the light bump of a conker. Some days the weather is warm still, the sunshine breaking through heavily clouded skies to reveal endless stretches of cyan, a familiar comfort blanket to swaddle us in. Other days the mornings begin damp and continue in that drizzly manner, leading to radiator-heated rooms and the encroaching gloom of dark evenings.

For me I’m currently experiencing both outlooks on Autumn. Seasonally speaking I think Autumn is breathtaking in every way. We can wrap up in our favourite coats and boots without the numbing bite of Winter, enjoy the bejewelled colours of the great outdoors and the seasonal foods to stock our cupboards and fridges with. But with a new season comes a new academic year. Semester One begins again for the fourth (and final) time, that heavy feeling in my stomach of the impending work to come, never getting easier, always pushing me harder. I realise that I will return to living without my family whom I have seen everyday for four months, my home pals will become pixels through the electronic screen, lines of text on a private message.

I’ve always tried to be a positive, optimistic person. I try my best when people I know are feeling down or going through hell, but when it comes to myself I can’t help but view situations at their worst. I feel like any prospect of a future in a decent enough job is bleak and am terrified of failure. I’m hoping this September will be the last time I ever feel this, but chances are it won’t be. This time next year I’ll probably be experiencing similar nerves but in anticipation of a job interview or my First Day At Work.

Having come to this realisation however, that we will always face challenges in both personal and academic/work life, I just simply have to breathe it in, close the final page of the previous chapter, bite the bullet and continue to kick ass. Everybody goes through it, everybody will go through it, all in our own individual ways, it’s just about how we choose to go about it.

As this new season begins, and I face the beginning of the end, or perhaps the end of the beginning, I will go into it with an open heart, a clear mind, and the knowledge that I’ll make it out alive – if a little scathed, with new prospects in line and my pixelated friends and family there with me every step of the way..

TTFN, P x